Saturday, April 10, 2010

The real deal on parenting....

Welcome to my dark side...

I believe that some people should not be allowed to reproduce.

Aggghhhhhhh.... that feels so good to get that off my chest. Really.

Yeah, normally I'm all "peace, love everyone, the world is a wonderful place". Well, not today. I'm letting the opinionated, self important woman in me out.

Hell, I'm not even saying that I'm a perfect mother neither. I work very hard every day to fight my inner demons. I have a large temper and it takes ALOT of self control to handle my children on some days. Do I fight the urge to whoop their little booties??? You bet. Do I fight the urge to yell obscenities at them when no form of punishment has worked??? Why yes sir, I do.

I can usually put my blinders on while I'm working (remember? peds nurse).... No, no, no, not the blinders when I see something illegal because I will report you, for the record. I'm talking about stupidity and self indulgence. Making STUPID choices when it comes to the life of a precious CHILD. It has hit close to home now too. I can't and won't go into detail on this blog because there will likely be court dates in the future (I said close to home didn't I?) and I don't want to jeopardize anything with this blog BUT at some point, someone has to stick up for what is right in a child's life.

Let's run down a check list shall we?

1. It is unacceptable to have children, and then have more children, simply because the state will pay you more money to sit on your lazy ass and not work. Yes, I have utilized the state in my past, it was set up so that children would be cared for BUT if you ask me, you should be working or going to school with a goal of being off state aid or minimizing your need of state aid by a certain length of time.

2. If you are on state aid for food, use it for what it is intended for. Buy nutritious food for your children.

3. Don't drink and drive with children in the car. Period. In my world, we have a two beer limit over the course of two hours when the children are with us. Perfectly legal and safe.

4. For all you single moms out there.... BE SELECTIVE IN YOUR CHOICE OF PARTNERS. It's not hard to do, I've done it for Christ sakes. After Ryan died, I dated a gaggle of men. Do you know how many of those men met my children? TWO, and I married the second one.

5. For all you single mothers out there... BE SELECTIVE IN YOUR CHOICE OF PARTNERS. AGAIN. If they abuse drugs, control you, or have prior felony convictions? Duh.... it shouldn't even be a choice. Let me ask you this, is your love life more important then the life of your child? Would you be happy if your child became injured, or worse, dies because you made a wrong choice and dated someone that caused it?

6. Watch your children. I don't know if some people ever get this part. Know where your children are at all times, and make sure it's a safe place for them to be as well.

7. GROW UP. Once you make the choice to have unprotected sex, you are relinquishing most all of your life. You are not only responsible for yourself anymore. You are now in charge of a beautiful creature of nature.... you are in charge of EVERY ASPECT OF A CHILD'S HEALTH AND WELL BEING. EVERY SINGLE PART OF IT. It's not just to house them, cloth them, and feed them. It's also to LOVE them, NURTURE them, EDUCATE them, PROTECT them.

8. GROW UP (AGAIN). When you have a child with someone else, you should know that you will have to see that other person FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. It doesn't matter what led to a separation/divorce/parting of ways, you HAVE to learn how to get along, compromise, and make good decisions TOGETHER when it comes to the child you have together.

9. Just because you "love" someone, it doesn't make it all better. If you have children from a previous relationship and your new partner is pretty much bad all around, then you need to get over yourself and those "love conquers all" feelings and get with the program. What may be good for you can be very bad for your child. As stated above, once you have that child? You are now required to make the right choices.

10. Last but not least.... USE SOME FUCKING BIRTH CONTROL! For Christ sakes, we live in one of the leading industrial nations where you can walk into a gas station and buy a condom, or walk into Walgreen's and get Plan B. Birth control may not be 100% perfect (if used correctly though it's pretty damn close) but it is there to help so that the poor children I'm speaking about above don't have to go through life paying for the mistakes of there parents.

In the end, I will say ONE thing significant to this little rant. Little brother, I am very proud of you. You knew from the very beginning that things weren't quite right and I'm happy you have chosen to follow your gut. You may be an asshole (ha! had to throw that in) but you try, like I do, every day to fight those inner demons and to be a good parent. I honestly hope you can work things out in your situation but if you can't, I will be here to support you in any way that I can, with best interest given to my own family. Love you, and I wish you luck in the battle you are about to go into....

I will leave you all with a pic of us from our recent trip to FLORIDA! (Reason i haven't blogged much lately :)


  1. *AHEM* Have you been looking into my head and reading my mind? Girl, I could add volumes to this, but I'm with you on every single point!!!

    (BTW, both of those scarves were crocheted. I still haven't tackled the How to Knit book! tee hee!)

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  3. i agree. 'nuff said.
    and happy belated birthday!!