My Body, My Hair, My Mystery....

I was chatting with a friend last week and she inquired as to how I was doing and that she was worried about me....

I don't think a lot of you know but last February my hair started to fall out in bald patches.

Yeah, sounds fun right?

And most of you DO know that I'm a nurse, with a brain that doesn't stop until I find some kind of logical and reasonable answer to medical mysteries :)

So I started telling that friend all the testing and theories that I have pondered and discussed with varying doctors and nurse practitioners... she said, "You should write a blog about that! I'm a woman and I didn't know a lot of that!" :)

SO here we go....

When I first found out about my hair, I saw a few doctors and was generally dismissed. Some of them referred to me being crazy, others said, "it's just stress", others said you sometimes just can't explain random hair loss.

(Side Note: I work with some of these doctors and was a little taken a back at how I was dismissed. So, they trust me with their other patients care but when I have questions and want to look at my own health I'm dismissed? Makes me feel like a very very small person, just so you know....) (Also made me doubt some of the people and places I have previously believed in)

In the end of the first round of doctors, I decided that sorry bitches, I don't buy any of the crap you just tried to feed me.

I had my Thyroid tested (which I actually had to go thru my chiropractor to get the tests ordered).... and my thyroid is a thing of beauty :)

Then one evening, my husband said, "It HAS to have something to do with your IUD." BAM. Hubby, you are oh so smart sometimes :) I had an IUD for approximately 6 years. SO I began to research this....

This is where my post may become confusing because a lot of us females are TRULY unaware of just WHAT hormones do to our bodies and how certain methods of birth control can affect us. I will try to explain this as best I can but I hope this reaches some females somewhere and makes us all a little more aware of how important it is to pay attention to our bodies....

We females need 2 main hormones for us to BE FEMALE. They are Estrogen and Progesterone. Hormones are such a mystery though, even to me, as a nurse! The levels of them change continuously through out our monthly cycles and many doctors and medical professionals are unaware of how a fluctuation in our hormones can affect our entire bodies.... not to mention, we have all become MODERN and we have taken it upon ourselves to mess with our hormone levels with birth control to prevent unwanted pregnancies....

Enter in the Mirena IUD (which I had). It contains a FAKE hormone called Progestin. This Progestin mimics and replaces a woman's natural ability to produce Progesterone. Progesterone is VERY important for many many reasons with in our bodies. I had the Mirena for approximately 6 years....

Once I had the IUD removed.... my hair started falling out a few months later....

YET EVERY DOCTOR I SAW REFUSED TO AGREE THAT MY HAIR LOSS COULD BE RELATED TO MY IUD.

So instead of a doctor, I went through an advanced practice nurse practitioner who actually sat down with me and has committed herself to helping me try to find out why I have this sudden and random alopecia. I had my hormones tested and low and behold, my levels are low. I have also had varying other symptoms such as night sweats, hot flashes, "foggy thinking", etc. Turns out, low levels of progesterone or estrogen can cause these too.... Bottom line, she offered for me to start a natural progesterone cream to supplement my lack of progesterone. I asked her if it was ok to wait for 3 months or so to see if my body can figure out how to make more on its own.... Not that I don't appreciate her advise, but I pondered that if I supplemented my natural production with Progestin for 6 years, wouldn't I be doing the same by putting progesterone cream on my body? So for now, I am suffering through watching my hair fall out, all in the hopes that the torment I put my body through will subside and it will heal itself....

There are many things about this that bother me though....

Think about it. Most females are on some type of hormone from teenage years through menopause! So how can we really know the exact effects of what we are doing to ourselves if we mask it the entire time.... I will admit, I am lucky. My husband "took care of business" so we won't have anymore kids... So at the age of 31 I am free to be completely off birth control, completely off fake hormones, and I have no fears or worries of pregnancy right now.

BUT for those females that have to protect themselves from pregnancy, what are we doing to our bodies? What effect do these long term birth controls have on our bodies? Have you researched all the side effects? What do you chose to suffer through all for the sake of convenience? How will we ever know the answers to these questions if we use fake hormones from such a young age until we virtually reach menopause?

My hair loss isn't the only thing that happened.... I started to get large boils on my face about the same time I had the IUD put in. I saw doctors and dermatologists and was told it was adult onset cystic acne, here's a life time supply of antibiotics to control it.... but guess what? I took that IUD out, and I haven't had a boil since.... Makes you wonder huh?

Bottom line ladies.... think about it. Take charge of your healthcare. If you have problems and you think it may be hormone related, look into it. Don't let anyone knock the wind out of your sails until you feel like you have a grasp on your situation or an answer...

And last but not least, pay attention to your body :)

Honoring Our Mothers

Thoughts on being a Mother on Mother's Day....

To my children....

You are my life, you are my joy. You are my sorrow and my anger. You are the miracles that I was blessed to be able to create with in my womb, with in my body. My body created and gave shelter to your first cell, your first heart beat, your first feelings of connection to another human being. My body nourished you and housed you for your ten little fingers and ten little toes to take shape, for your bodies to grow, and for your minds to form and bring you to the beautiful children that you are today. My body fed you, kept you warm, and kept you safe. You are me. You are the only single thing in this world that I would give my own life for. You are part of me and all of me...

While I appreciate the cards with the glitter and the beautiful flowers, I appreciate you more.... For me, Mother's Day is everyday. It is all the little smiles I see and the playful giggles I hear. It is all the sadness I feel when you are hurt. It is also the anger and discipline I share as I mold and help to shape the men you will be in the future.

Always remember.... everything I have done with you and for you was done with love from every ounce of my being.

********************

To my Mother....

Mom, oh how I respect the love and nourishment you gave to me. You also helped to mold and create the person that I am today. My attitude, my caring, my craziness, my love... you made me into the woman I am proud to be today. Just as my body has nourished my own children, I know that I am a product of that nourishment myself. You gave me life and I will forever be grateful for your love.

********************

To all my other Mom's....

There are many of you. All the strong and beautiful mother's out there that help to give me guidance and knowledge, you are wonderful. Whether you are my friends, mother-in-law, or mentor.... you are also a part of me. Mother's do share a common bond and I am happy to share this bond with all the Mother's in my life. We are all in this together, raising our children and sharing knowledge from one woman to another. We are each other's shoulders to cry on, ears to vent to, and encouragement in difficult times. You all have a special place in my heart and to you I wish you happiness today and everyday.

********************

To our Mother Earth....

Of course I can't forget this Mother neither. After all, we as Mother's are a part of Mother Earth as well. Today, on Mother's Day, I will spend part of the day buried in your beauty. Digging in the dirt to provide the seed that you will house and nourish so that I can do the same for my children. Through you I see the beauty of being a Mother myself. I see my connection with nature and with the miracle of creation and providing for others.

I can't think of a better Mother's Day then planting my garden and by realizing how much as Mother's we are like the Earth....

********************

I hope all the mother's I know have a beautiful day, not just today, but everyday that we are allowed to be Mother's.

"The most beautiful word on the lips of mankind is the word “Mother,” and the most beautiful call is the call of “My mother.” It is a word full of hope and love, a sweet and kind word coming from the depths of the heart. The mother is everything – she is our consolation in sorrow, our hope in misery, and our strength in weakness. She is the source of love, mercy, sympathy, and forgiveness….

Everything in nature bespeaks the mother. The sun is the mother of earth and gives it its nourishment of heart; it never leaves the universe at night until it has put the earth to sleep to the song of the sea and the hymn of birds and brooks. And this earth is the mother of trees and flowers. It produces them, nurses them, and weans them. The trees and flowers become kind mothers of their great fruits and seeds. And the mother, the prototype of all existence, is the eternal spirit, full of beauty and love."

--Kahlil Gibran